TEST DRIVE MEME #8

[zhautasmods]

Awakening

Artificial lights assault your eyes. It takes a few blinks for them to adjust properly. Quiet mechanical whirs and clicks sound in the small, sparse space that you had likely been corralled into before being put to sleep for the long journey. As grogginess fades away and lucidity starts to take hold, you begin to remember where you are and why you’re here on this spaceship thousands of lightyears away from home and perhaps everything and everyone you’ve ever known.

The multiverse is sick. It’s dying. And it’s up to you to save it. Or, at least, that’s what the Zenith Corporation had told you when they announced their search for a cure across the multiverse. They hand-picked individuals to be "volunteers" for the next stage of experimentation. Maybe they made it sound dire, maybe you already had your mind set on helping, or maybe the exact specifications of how you could help were vague. Considering the alternative was wasting away on your home planet with no promise of when this cure might actually come to fruition, it ultimately wasn’t much of a choice either way.

Everything comes to life the more awake that you start to feel. "Good morning, volunteer," sounds a synthetic, masculine voice in your ear. That must be one of the fancy features they advertised about the chip that was injected just beneath your skin. "About time you woke up." A projected HUD above your torso displays and scrolls through several readings about the state of your being. "A scan of your vital signs show that everything is functioning as normal." There’s a small pause. "Oh, actually- Nevermind, that's probably fine." The sense of dread that follows that misleading phrase is accompanied by a light chime. "Emotional responses are still accurate, too. Good to know." Without any further explanation or allowing for protest, he continues on. "Hopefully, you aren't too sore after sleeping that long. We’ll be descending to planet #05031941 - common name designated as Zhautas - in approximately three hours. There will be a brief orientation for all volunteers shortly after landing. In order to stimulate what little brain activity you have, I suggest visiting the museum for a relaxing bit of artistic appreciation."

If you have any questions, make sure they're worth my time. My name is R.Y.U.O. and on behalf of all of us at the Zenith Corporation, we’re glad to have you aboard.

Code Credit

Artistic Endeavours

There's a whole array of colored lines for volunteers to follow these days. Red lights lead the way to the gym, green is where you'll find the garden, blue will be your path to the pool, orange is where the food court is, aqua is how you find the aquarium, grey will lead you to spa, moss green leads the way to the obstacle course, and now added on is hot pink for the museum. That might seem like a strange color for it... but it'll make sense soon enough!

As always, the color o҉s҉t҉i҉g҉n҉u҉h҉ is- Wait, what do you mean the color o҉s҉t҉i҉g҉n҉u҉h҉ is so bright it's searing your eyes? Huh. That's weird. Maybe the replacement light they made was the wrong kind. Oh, well. They’ll fix that for the next trip. For now, don’t worry about it. It probably didn’t lead to anything important anyway!

1. While the staff are helpful, many of them seem to be defeated. There's an unmistakable melancholy in the air. If anyone tries to ask, they reassure volunteers that everything is fine. Still, the moment that anything goes wrong or they can't exactly answer a question it's clear that they grow even more self-conscious. Just what's going on around here?
   
   They won't say. Maybe one or two might eventually let it slip that the Zenith Corporation isn't especially happy lately with a wanted criminal still at large on Zhautas that seems to be terrorizing Zenith at every turn. Her name is Hoshiko and she's a pirate that is capable of escaping every attempt Zenith has made so far to apprehend her. Recently, she caused quite a bit of destruction and caused Zenith to lose their good standing in some parts of Zhautas. Still, try not to worry about it too much. Oh, and, don't tell their boss that they let you know this. They technically weren't supposed to.
   
   


2. As you draw closer to museum, some soothing music begins to play through the halls. It's supposed to get volunteers really in the mood for the museum, if you know what they mean. That's because it isn't your typical museum, of course. If you were one of the few that didn't really know the details of why you were coming here in the first place, you'll definitely know now when it's all out on display.
   
   "Do make sure not to inappropriately touch anything," says R.Y.U.O. flatly. Metal flooring changes to marble beneath your feet upon stepping into a large museum. The emphasis of these exhibits is sex. That is obvious in the statues and diagrams of alien creatures and their mating rituals. There are also flower bouquets that look oddly phallic (or are made out of condoms). That's one way to get creative! Additionally, there are paintings of nature from Nevrione that look like genitalia both human and not and is meant to be symbolic of sex being intrinsic to a natural way of life.



3. Don't worry, they'll have places that you can sneak away if it gets to be a little overwhelming. The museum has a lounge of plush, red chairs to sink into if all those racy exhibits prove to be a bit too much. Upon tilting your head back to relax, however, you might just notice the suspension ropes hanging from the ceiling. Or maybe it's the man wearing the zipper mask sitting across the way that catches your eye instead.
   
   Oh, whoops- Looks like you might have gotten turned around at some point. This isn't the lounge at all. This is actually the kink section of the museum. There's a wide range of exhibits here that are all about the harder kinks out there across the multiverse. There are informational pamphlets and explanations of things you might have never heard of or thought of doing. Of course, if you want to keep them for reference for later... you're more than welcome to!
   
   In trying to leave, you might find yourself walking through a mirror maze instead. If you're wondering how this is sexy, well- Just use your imagination! Or read the nearest informational sign that reads about how masturbating or having sex in front of a mirror can be a kink for some people. That works too!
   
   
4. This museum never seems to end. In this next part, there's a gathering of people with fancy pens and sketchbooks. It looks like perhaps an art class is in session. Whether you decide to stay and see what they might be painting or choose not to disturb and attempt to go along your way, you'll be addressed suddenly by a large mustached man with six eyes and three pairs of spectacles. "You there!" he suddenly beams. "Yes, you, the- What species are you again? Oh, it doesn't matter." He clicks his mandibles and smiles (or the closest thing to it) as his fuzzy claws rub together idly.
   
   "I'm glad you could make it," he continues on, despite any protests you might make. "But you're wearing far too much for this modeling session!" Modeling session? What in the world is he going on about? You didn't sign up as a model for anything! Any protests you make die on your lips as he talks over you and tugs you towards a dressing room in the back of the studio. "Hurry now, we only have a set amount of time before orientation and landing! These people are eager to draw a, mm. Whatever you are!" He'll get it eventually. "There's a towel in case you're a little shy but it'll need to be removed once you're on the podium."
   
   With that, he leaves you alone to get undressed. Maybe you decide to roll with it! Why not go bare for all to see and sketch? It's a once in a lifetime opportunity and you'd be helping out some very nice art students. Or maybe not. In that case, it seems you're not the only one that got roped into this impromptu nude modeling session unawares. There are likely other volunteers just as confused and looking for help. Perhaps together you can convince this guy he's got the wrong person... or even find the actual model. Better hurry though! The teacher isn't a patient man and there's no doubt he'll be asking where you are before long.

Orientation

Shortly after landing, an announcement is made to everyone aboard the ship. It’s time to find your way to the amphitheater for orientation. If anyone gripes, they are reminded that it has mandatory safety information that the Zenith Corporation is legally required to cover. In fact, there's even a quiz at the end to make sure you understand all the technical ins and outs! The Zenith Corporation only has your best interests at heart. They also can’t afford another lawsuit or PR nightmare but who can, really? It’s only a half an hour long and R.Y.U.O. tells everyone that, while boring, it is mandatory by law so you best pay attention.

1. Are you way too cool for school? If you try to play hooky, the crew members of the spaceship are already on guard. You're not the first one to try this and they doubt you'll be the last. Try as you might to super sleuth your way around, there’ll be someone at apparently every single twist and turn.
   
   It’s also very likely that in scrambling to find a place to hide, you’ll run into someone else breaking the rules! Perhaps great minds think alike and you decide to try to defy the system together. Or maybe they’re totally just getting in your way and you decide instead to throw them to the wolves to give yourself a better chance at escaping the certain boredom that is an informational seminar. The choice is yours, volunteer!


2. Whether you come to the orientation willingly or are dragged in by one of the staff, you’ll quickly realize just how right R.Y.U.O. was. This is the most boring thing you've ever sat through. A half an hour feels almost like ten hours instead. The last time you checked your watch, it was somehow later than when you check it now. Is time going backward? It sure seems like it the longer you listen to the monotone voice read over colored flavor text clearly meant to engage but missing its mark stupendously. Even the motivation of a quiz at the end that needs to be passed in order to disembark seems to do little to nothing for your dwindling attention span.
   
   Finally, there’s a break in the bureaucratic monotony. The faceless, droning voice announces an additional seminar from The Zenith Corporation! In light of some recent... issues, they're really trying to promote their volunteer program as something beneficial for the multiverse but also for you! Despite what you might hear from established volunteers, they really do have your best interests at heart and want your help to succeed in curing this disease.
   
   It's all very touching, isn't it? How much they care? Maybe you buy into it and think, wow! I'm really helping to save the multiverse. Or maybe it reads like try hard propaganda to get you to see them as the benevolent ones when they're not actually as good as they seem. After all, if established volunteers are having problems that they feel the need to point out- Isn't that just a little bit suspicious, maybe?
   
   "Thank you, Zenith," the voice says, level and not giving anything away. "Wasn't that informative! Volunteers, what do you think about the topic of Zenith's operations here on Zhautas? Discuss amongst yourselves!"


3. Hopefully, you didn't forget about the quiz! The staff certainly didn't. After the pre-recorded seminar is run, papers are handed out. A quiet shuffle carries through the room as people pass them to and fro down the aisles. It all seems rather arbitrary and tedious but remember! You have to pass in order to disembark.
   
   It isn't too hard. Or maybe it is. Perhaps it's just the pressure that you only have fifteen minutes to complete it. What was the professor's first name again? How many research facilities are there on the planet? Staff are scrutinizing your every move now, it feels like. Do you take the risk and try to whisper for help to the person next to you? Pass notes? Do what you must to succeed! ...Or you can just shamefully take the quiz again and again and again until they're legally obligated to let you off board.

NEVRIONE (JAN 24th - FEB 17th)

Finally, it's time to disembark on Zhautas. Instead of stepping into a tropical paradise, however, volunteers are greeted by the crisp winter air and crunch of ice and snow beneath their shoes. Welcome to Nevrione! Even if it isn't quite as warm as you were hoping, in more ways than one.

1. Volunteers will be dropped off at the outskirts of the city of Heawood. It's unfortunately seen better days. The forest is in shambles compared to what was advertised. It looks like there was a large battle here recently and, well, you wouldn't be wrong! If you ask anyone, they'll talk about the recent troubles they'd had. Something about a space pirate causing a scene and destroying a Zenith outpost, the native gods being summoned to defend the country, and... those gods being killed. It sounds like a lot happened in this country before your arrival and now everyone is left to pick up the pieces.
   
   While volunteers were initially greeted with open arms a couple months ago, the reception that this group gets will be as cold as the snow outside. The locals don't seem too pleased about the idea of more off-worlders coming into their home and potentially making things worse. Of course, not everyone feels this way, but a large majority of the population do. It might make it hard to get directions or learn more about the local culture when they aren't really willing to share. Sorry, volunteers! The Zenith Corporation actually says that you'll be leaving soon so it's likely better that you won't have the chance to get too attached.
   
   
2. Suddenly, R.Y.U.O. turns on one of the newer features to help volunteers cheer up a little. Don't say he never did anything for you. Someone next to you might sprout cat or dog ears. Don’t mind if you get knocked in the face suddenly by someone’s new butterfly wings. It happens! It’s also possible they take on the long whiskers of a Coeurl or plumage of a Chocobo or other animals entirely unfamiliar to some. Either way, everyone just got a lot more animal-like. While it doesn’t look exactly like the natives, it does bring a smile to the faces of the locals and they seem a bit more generally receptive to the people waltzing into their homeland.
   
   
   
   This feature is extremely customizable. Volunteers can toggle it off if they don’t want it at all. Additionally, they can have as many or as few animal features as they’d like. They can also change what creature they’d like to take after with just a thought! The only limitation seems to be that they can only appear as one animal at a time.
   
   While all the add-ons seem to be mostly for aesthetic, it is a lot of fun to play around with!



3. In Nevrione the current seasons is clearly Winter. All the leaves have been raked up and used for other things. What's left of the trees are barren and without leaves. It really does make everything look a little more bleak. What a shame that volunteers aren't getting to see it at its most beautiful.
   
   Of course, just because there isn't a lot of growth doesn't mean that there isn't any. There's actually a winter plant that seems to be just about everywhere and one that people will know- it's mistletoe! It isn't called that here, of course, but it still has the same tradition as on earth. Two people that are caught underneath it should kiss. This can be as platonic, or not, as you want it to be. Even hugs are acceptable, really! Just as long as you share a little bit of affection or intimacy with the other person, it's said to be good fortune for ringing in the new year. The people of Nevrione sure do love their good fortune, don't they?
   
   Of course, this plant comes with a catch. You'll find yourself stuck in some way if you don't participate in the custom. It's a little trick that the Selva - the resident fairy folk - play for when they hibernate during the winter. These creatures never seem to stop causing mischief. So, if you don't feel the love... then you're going to get stuck until you do! This doesn't have to be physically either. You could be stuck on a decision you're trying to make, on a question that was asked of you, or any number of things. The point is though, you'll be stuck on it until someone kisses or hugs some sense into you again.

MAIN RESEARCH FACILITY (FEB 18th & ON)

Or maybe you're part of a later group that ends up transported straight to the island instead. Stepping into a tropical paradise as promised is pretty nice! Despite the fact that it's only the beginning of the year here and technically winter, the main research facility is nestled on a comfortable little island that doesn't change temperature too much throughout the year.

1. They were supposed to have everyone's rooming assignments ready. Unfortunately, R.O.S.I.E. has only just recently woken up and it slipped through the cracks. Honestly, she thought she had more time! She's had so much to catch up on after spending so long non-operational. While apologetic, it doesn't change the fact that you're out of a room for now.
   
   Due to their error, the Zenith staff do their best to make volunteers feel at home... outside. The weather is nice, they have perfectly good (aphro-laced!) tents for use, and why not? This an adventure, right? What's more adventurous than sleeping out under the stars on a whole new world? It's like something right out of your imagination! However they sell it to you, they sell it very well. Even if you are upset, your complaints seem to fall on deaf ears after a certain point and you might just have to accept defeat.
   
   At least R.O.S.I.E. has the courtesy to project a movie for everyone to watch during the evening before lights out. This one was selected by R.Y.U.O., the other A.I. that you might hear from time to time now that he's been a bit more involved. It's a classic and he's going to be disappointed if you don't appreciate its subtly and charm.
   
   
2. During the night, you'll realize you're not alone. It's quiet, at first, but then a noise comes from out in the dark. It sounds again louder and very close by. A clear, audible-
   
   Ribbit. A brightly colored frog is sitting just outside your tent (or by your side, if you chose to make do without!) and blinks once you notice it. It gives a little hop, another croak, and then snatches whatever food you might have leftover from dinner. It undulates violently soon as it eats any scraps lying around then pops apart and suddenly there's two.
   
   If you don't want to end up overrun, you might need to put your food away! Maybe this is why you were told it wasn't good to keep it out. If you try to touch the frog to remove it, however, there's a sudden buzz in your ear and a light chime before R.O.S.I.E. speaks gently, "I wouldn't touch that if I were you. It's toxic to most species! You're going to have to find another way to get this little guy out of your space."
   
   "Are there any sticks around? Maybe you could ask your neighbor!"



3. "Do you like the stars?" asks R.O.S.I.E. in the dead of night. Don't worry, she won't ask if you're asleep! In fact, it seems like she might be contacting the insomniacs or those that are having trouble specifically. An A.I. doesn't need to sleep, but it does get lonely it seems.
   
   She guides volunteers out to a nice viewing spot, but also warns of the jungle's dangers. If you happen to see any red eyes staring back at you in the dark, steer clear. They don't seem especially aggressive lately but demons are still bad news. But hopefully, the view of a spectacular crescent moon and stars freckling the inky black sky make up for any feelings of uncertainty you might still have, or at the very least provide a distraction from whatever has your mind keeping you from falling asleep.
   
   "You should make a wish," she encourages. Though, of course, you're not the only one she directed this way so your wish might not be as secret as you're hoping it to be if you say it aloud.

Network/Bangr

During all the goings-on, R.Y.U.O. will prompt you to set up your presence on the network. Pick a username, a profile picture, and commence to shitposting immediately if you so desire! Additionally, if you want to get a headstart on your contribution to the volunteer program, why not set up your Bangr? R.Y.U.O. even has an icebreaker question ready for you! They change every month. This month's question is:

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?*
(*Despite what you might actually put, know that R.Y.U.O. is a little bored. What you wrote might not actually be what's displayed! I.E., you can totally use this as a misfire type deal in case your character wouldn't answer this question.)

bangr

Professor Quintalian | 35

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
I'd have to say that winter is my favorite, actually. There's just something so nice about cuddling up next to someone who's warm and comfortable during the colder months of the year.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

BANGR CODE <raw-code> <!--MAIN BACKGROUND & HEADER--> <center> <div style="background: url('https://i.imgur.com/5JdOZQB.png'); margin: auto; width: 300px; height: 500px; padding: 30px; border-radius: 20px;"> <div style="font-family: 'Orbitron', Open Sans, sans serif; color: #d3d7f9; text-transform: uppercase; font-size: 28px; text-align: center; letter-spacing: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; border-bottom-style: groove; border-bottom-color: #aeb1d1; border-bottom-width: 1px; line-height: 16px" align="center"> <i><b>bangr</b></i> </div> <!--PROFILE IMAGE BG & PROFILE IMAGE--> <div style="width: 275px; height: 275px; border: 5px solid #aeb1d1; border-radius: 170px; padding: 0px; margin: 15px auto"> <div style="background: url('https://i.imgur.com/cIPyvXC.png'); background-size: cover; width: 225px; height: 225px; border-radius: 180px; padding: 25px; background-position: center;"> <div style="background: url('**YOUR PROFILE IMAGE HERE**'); background-size: auto 220px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-position: center; border-radius: 130px; width: 223px; height: 223px; padding-top: 223px; background-position: center; border: 1px dotted #aeb1d1"> </div> </div> </div> <!--PROFILE TEXT--> <div style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: 'Orbitron', Open Sans, sans serif; text-transform: uppercase; margin-top: -10px; text-align: center; color: #dadeff;"> <b>NAME | AGE</b> </div> <div style="height: 120px; background: url('https://i.imgur.com/mi2ArCG.png'); overflow-y: auto; margin: 5px auto; border-radius: 6px; padding: 10px; font-family: Open Sans, sans serif"> **INSERT QUESTION HERE**<br /> **INSERT ANSWER HERE** </div> </div> <div style="clear: both"></div> </div> <br /> <!--YES/NO CODES--> <center><table><tr><td style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span> </td><td style="text-align: center"><span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span></div></td></tr><tr> <td style="text-align: center"><big><big><big><b>YES</big></big></big></b><br /> <textarea><span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span> </textarea></td> <td style="text-align: center"><big><big><big><b>NO</big></big></big></b><br /> <textarea><span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span> </textarea></td> </tr> </table> </center> </center> </raw-code> </textarea>

PLEASE NOTE: This BANGR code is the COMMENT-FRIENDLY version, there is a separate code for entries! If you're testing this code before posting it here please do so in a comment to an entry for accuracy!

Extra Notes

• Remember that all prompts are OTA! It can now be assumed that after the ship lands, current volunteers in-game were able to board and hang-out for a little bit before it leaves again! That means established volunteers can welcome new members, show them around parts of the ship they're familiar with, and explore new areas that weren't open during their own arrival! Only new volunteers will be taking the orientation quiz, but established volunteers are free to peek inside the room or try to help with the quiz!


• A reminder that the TDM can be considered game canon and timeline-wise the TDM takes place on the 8th when the arrival ship arrives, as shown on the calendar. As always, current players may top level, if they so choose!


• Going into FEBRUARY, we will be continuing our APPLICATION CAP OF FORTY (40).

NAVIGATION ✦ TAKEN ✦ RESERVES

Comments

IC QUESTIONS (FEB 18TH & ON)

[r_o_s_i_e]

[ Ask R.O.S.I.E. all your IC questions here! ]

Peter B. Parker | Into the Spider-Verse

[thwip_and_release]

i. artistic endeavors - food!

Once he's free of the pod and its fairly unflattering assessment of his person, Peter passes multicolored lines, ignoring all of them for orange. He doesn't know what kind of nutrients they were pumping them all full of during the journey, but they were a) inadequate, and b) not cheeseburgers.

God, he misses cheeseburgers. And pizza!

"Hey, do you guys have pizza?" he asks the first open unit in the food court. "Round bread, red sauce, cheese on top and never beneath the cheese? Sometimes it's square if you're maniac?"

He's met with a blank glace, and Peter shrugs. "You can just mash some cheese and tomatoes down on bread and cut it into triangles, my standards are like...ridiculously low." They shuffle away, and Peter calls, "You can stick it under the broiler?"

ii. artistic endeavors - art!

Peter is squirming his way through the museum, smashed bread pizza in hand, but his discomfort has nothing to do with the beguiling music and everything to do with the art. His Aunt had these saucy flowers up all over before she passed, just like the Aunt May alive in Miles' universe. Miles' universe, in which Doc Ock was a woman. Who Aunt May had known by name, even in costume.

"Oh god," Peter groans, turning to bang his head against a Georgia Okeeffe-like lily and its proud, thrusting stamen. "Doc Ock fucked my aunt, didn't she??"

iii. nevrione 2 - animals!

"Oooohhh," Peter exhales as another volunteer explains the goober placed in all their heads. "So I have dog ears to blend in? I can have anything?"

Flush with new - and frankly stupid - purpose, Peter runs through several - goat ears, cat ears, horse ears, before a thought strikes him. "Hey, can this thing do spiders?" he calls, turning to see who he can ask. The volunteer looks at his eight eyes once and runs away screaming.

"Oh, so that's...pretty realistic, right," Peter murmurs, switching quickly back to fluffy kitten ears.

iv. wild card! anything, anywhere:

:D? :D? :D?

v. bangr:

bangr

Peter B. Parker| 37

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
You'd think it'd be summer, but it gives me major swampass in the suit.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

ii

[leftwithmybones]

He'd just come here to try and get away from all the craziness, annoyed when there's all these people. Not to mention, there's people staring at paintings and talking about their aunts fucking things, which he doesn't really know what to think, but there he is, stuck in the path of the guy, and there's no way to really move on without acknowledging it.

"What in the hell is a Doc Ock?" he has to ask, ignoring the painting for now (probably ignoring the painting forever, if he's honest).

Eddie Brock | Venom

[thelosers]

Nevrione
[The first thing Venom wanted to do after lying impatiently in stasis was, of course, to find the nearest food hall and gorge on the local cuisine. It's cold, bitingly so, and it makes Eddie walk briskly into the biggest building with warm yellow and orange lights cascading inside the windowpane.

Everyone looks a little dejected, on the weary side of wary. Maybe it's the cold. Maybe it's whatever the hell has been going on before they got here. Either way it sends Eddie to one of the corner tables and he lifts up a menu, keeping his head low studying it as if he wasn't planning on ordering as much as he can afford to get.]

WE WANT ONE OF EVERYTHING Ssshh, don't. Just-- give me a minute. BUT WE WANT-- Okay okay just wait goddamnit!


Bangr

bangr

EDDIE | 40

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
ANY SEASON IS MATING SEASON BUT WE LIKE HUNTING SEASON WE LIKE DUCK AND VENISON AND WATERMELON

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Bangr | un: nunya

[assholic]

Who the fuck hunts watermelon?

[Sure, there should have been a check or an x, but this was a more pressing issue. What world did this guy come from where you hunted watermelon? Was that a different thing? Did she have to worry about mutant watermelons now? Goddammit. Why?]

Nina Zenik | Six of Crows

[every_blossom_blooming]

I. Sure Looks Like Art
The art doesn't even make her blush, but Nina is thoroughly enjoying watching other people squirm and squeak their way through the exhibit. She wanders through it at her own pace, grateful for something else to look at after that-- rude awakening. She isn't even sure what to make of everything, only that she hopes she won't be regretting this any time soon.

She tucks her hair back, eyes wandering over a very phallic piece of... pottery?

"Well, they really don't leave much to the imagination with this one, do they. I wonder if it pours like a teapot."

II. Heawood
Of course it's winter. Even if Fjerdans had been celebrating the start of spring, it had still been freezing when she was scooped up from Djerholm. And now here she is again, in winter. Eternal, bleak winter. She used to like it before having to hike across glaciers.

Nina hugs her black coat around her as she takes in the damage surrounding the inn. The somewhat hostile looks coming from what she assumes are the natives has not gone unnoticed, but she knows she'd be rather put out if her home looked like a war zone. Saints, what has she gotten herself into?

"Well, looks like I missed all the fun," she says to no one in particular.

III. Wildcard!
surprise me!

IV. Network

bangr

Nina Zenik | 18

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Winter and fall are such cozy seasons for sex. Besides, I like stripping off layers: it's like unwrapping a present.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

network; UN: icepick

[gaijinsleeve]

✓

Isn't the stripping usually reserved for whoever you're with?

Nevrione- A

[inthemiddle]

[Silas is also a relatively small man, the same size as the man being accosted actually. Still, as a sworn pacifist, he did hate to witness conflict. Not the kind to stand idle by, he'll interject himself into the situation, walking up with a flutter of the flowers on his head.]

Good miss! Do set him down, please. If you are in need of help, I will assist you. Post haste.

Howard Stark | MCU

[gettheshowstarted]

1. Artistic endeavors - admiring the museum

Howard wouldn't say he's a huge fan of art. He's a fan of owning expensive art that other people would rather own. He can't say he has any particular taste, but he decides to check out the museum anyway, because no way is he going to the other options. Aquarium? Obstacle course? HA. The people seem downright depressed and he has nothing to say to them, so he just keeps on going to see what alien art even is. He has his hands in his pockets as he casually walks into the museum, and while he ain't an art expert, he sure knows what all of this is 'inspired' by.

He wanders through the museum, curiously checking out the different statues and alien rituals on display. "Arty alien pornography. Who knew?" He asks out loud. He wouldn't say it was getting him in the mood, but he'd take this over some weird splatter paint any day.

2. Research Facility - Stars

Howard's mind is buzzing. He's an insomniac even during good times, and with his mind racing over everything going on here, there's no way he's going to sleep. He looks at R.O.S.I.E. with no small amount of curiosity but shrugs and nods. "Yeah, sure, I like stars." It'll be interesting to see what kind of stars are out here, since they're probably not the same as his. Or are they? Either way, he needs to keep moving, so he heads on out to the viewing spot. He heads the warning about the jungle. He isn't stupid, he's not going to do something stupid like get eaten, nah.

The sky is pretty damn beautiful, and he finds himself smiling despite it all. Well, looks like some things could still knock the words right outta him. Except he's given a follow up question and he doesn't look over, considering the question. He almost answers it honestly, except he has no honest answers to give. "Make a wish, huh? Alright, I wish I had all all my money and my house and my cars and my favorite bourbon also Jarvis and a hamburger. But if I got to pick just one, I'm leaning toward the house."

3. Bangr

bangr

Howard Stark | 30

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Why do I have to pick? I guess anything but summer, too hot, unless we got my pool to dive into.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

hope you want another thread, because you're getting another thread

[thequitecontrary]

✓

I veto summer as well, though it's rather pleasant in England at least.

Cremisius Aclassi | Dragon Age: Inquisition

[just_aclassi_guy]

[A] AwakeningCremisius didn’t think he was dead, but he recalled overhearing a conversation between the Inquisitor and one of the Orlesian soldiers, the description of the bright light emitting from the Devine just on the edge of the Fade, and Cremisius thought, perhaps, that he was dead. He didn’t feel dead. He remembered the battle on the Storm Coast, the terrifying moment of doubt and uncertainty before he handed his fate over and had that trust returned in kind as he’d heard the horn sound across the bluffs. Retreat, retreat. They’d been traveling back to Skyhold. What was next? Now, the light stung his eyes even before he opened them; was this the Fade?

The room was unfamiliar, sterile in a way that places did not come naturally in most of the south. The voice that spoke to him was unfamiliar. There was no reason for him to be possessed but this—this smacked a little bit of possession, if he was hearing a voice. Right?

“Nevermind, that’s probably fine.”

“What,” Cremisius hissed. He didn’t like that at all. He tried to figure out where the voice was coming from, not really listening to anything in particular. Maker, what was going on? Where was he, and what had he gotten himself into, volunteering for this whole mess?

At any rate, there was a door, though, and a number of brightly colored stripes, and though Cremisius was scared he didn’t let it show. He’d gotten quite good at that over the years, after all.


[B1] Art Museum - displayIt was hard to be impressed by much of everything with Cremisius’s background. He’d grown up in Tevinter, and even as a soporati, and with his particular relationship with bodies and sex, he’d still gone to an orgy or two. He’d been living in Orlais for nearly a decade. He wasn’t sure if all this art was supposed to titillate or appall him, but if he was honest, it wasn’t doing either of those things.

If anything, it was all so over the top that it was sort of amusing.

He stood in front of one particular piece, a statue of a young man with quite a bit of generosity given to his form, and raised a brow. There was an awful temptation in him to flex in the same manner as the statue. So he did, and giggled a little bit because it was frankly ridiculous.

[B2] Art Museum – class“There’s a towel in case you’re a little shy but it’ll need to be removed once you’re on the platform.”

Cremisius could handle a lot of things by this point in his life. Strange non-Human creatures. Demons and the undead. Bathing in public. He had lived a lot and learned many things, in traveling from Tevinter to other places. This was not something he particularly relished learning and living, but he also wasn’t entirely certain that he could get out of it any other way. This was hardly the most embarrassing thing he’d ever done in his life, wasn’t it? And besides that, the easiest way out was through sometimes.

He tugged off his armor, the layers of his clothing. As long as he got his things back, he supposed he could spend a little while doing something absolutely asinine. When he was down to his stay and his shorts, he paused. This was nude enough for him, if he had any say in the matter. You could see his arms and almost all the way up his legs, and that was quite all right. He grabbed the towel and wrapped it around his body, without any intention of taking anything else off.


BANGR

bangr

CREMISIUS ACLASSI | 27

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
VIRGIN ALERT

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Wildcard [Got an idea? Contact me by PM here or on discord at krempuffs#5806 if you'd like to do something in particular]

Wildcard: Heawood

[aban_aqun]

Bull would recognize that body anywhere. Standing, sitting, prone, unconscious, slumped over a tavern table. Even if somehow all his memories had failed him, he would recognize the Kirkwall dragon on the armor.

There were many reasons why he should not surprise someone like Cremisius Aclassi. Bull disregarded all of them as he swept up behind the small Vint, impressively quiet for a man his size, and wrapped around him in a massive bear hug. Bull heard the quiet crunch of Krem's armor protesting as he lifted the young man off his feet.

"Krem!" he roared, aware that he shouldn't be so loud so close to Krem's ear. A few people nearby jumped at his volume.

Shannon Descoteaux | OC | Gifted & Talented

[postpartor]

Basic Character Information

ARTISTIC ENDEAVORS

4. ART!!

[ Unlike a lot of people, Shannon is pretty unfazed by the museum. The music was a bit much in her opinion, even if it was good music, but then this place in general is not particularly subtle.

She makes her way through the museum, finally thinking she's made it through to the other side, before she's accosted by the giant bug-man. If she hadn't had the details of alien genitalia seared into her brain for the past half hour, she would probably be more startled. Or, y'know, maybe not. She's not startled by a lot.

See: her acquiescing to model without protest, walking out in the towel and dropping it to trail from one hand as she takes her position. She draws the towel up to slide over one hip and holds it there, hiding nothing, as she raises her other hand to rest against her neck.

And, since she's creating art, she can't resist exercising a little bit of her power and projecting a thought into the mind of the nearest person, be they artist or fellow model. ]

Hell of a first day, huh?


NEVRIONE

2. ANIMALS

[ Okay, the whole animal thing is on the surface kind of ridiculous, but… But. There's a certain pull to it that she can't resist.

She might be fundamentally broken as a human being, but everyone likes pretty things, don't they?

Shannon does her best to find somewhere she won't be walked in on—a small clearing in part of the destroyed forest, out of the way but not too far from town. And then she taps in to the chip's new function, feeling the flex of muscle as her clothes somehow adjust around the spreading wings she gives herself.

She exhales softly, caught for a second in pure, childish wonder.

Maybe this trip was worth it. ]


MAIN RESEARCH FACILITY

3. STARS

[ Shannon never sleeps well in unfamiliar surroundings. It's a survival mechanism, really. Until you know the common sounds, smells, voices of a place, there's no way to tell if there's a nearby threat. So when R.O.S.I.E. asks her about the stars, guides her to a viewing spot, she goes without protest. How often does a person get to see the stars from another world?

And there are so many of them, here. A brand new firmament, with lights thrown across the dark like white sand.

A wish, is it? ]

I wish I was here for different reasons.


BANGR

bangr

Shannon Descoteaux | 27

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Nothing beats Autumn. A girl's gotta have her pumpkin spice lube.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

text - un: fleursdumal

[semicharmed]

✓

So that sounds delicious, and way better than the durian-flavored condom I encountered in the Zenith free bin.

Cameron Waltz | OC | Gifted & Talented

[enveloped]

Cam's very first stop is the museum. He didn't volunteer just to save the multiverse, he came for the experience. Having compulsively traveled so much of his own planet, seeing almost all there is to see, Cam couldn't pass up the once in a lifetime chance to experience a whole other planet for the very first time.

Cam's a strong advocate of mixing business with pleasure. Wherever he goes, he takes care to meet the people, experience the culture, and see and taste as much as he possibly can. That Cam can do it all that while saving lives and changing the world? There's a reason he's so obsessed with his work.

He can be found wandering the halls of the museum, captivated by the artwork. The content doesn't interest him half as much as the origin of each piece. Art makes up so much of culture, and the easiest way to see through the scope of a local is to become familiar with the way they view the world around them, often expressed through art, song, and literature. He always brings a piece home with him, his house is a gallery in and of itself.

"Oh my."

That said... Cam does have a young daughter, and he's currently stuck staring at a black and white photo of a very, very large penis, hand pressed to his bearded cheek for some time. As drawn as he is to this particular piece, it's not entirely appropriate. Where does one display a monochromatic penis, over the couch? In the kitchen? The bedroom? That would certainly set the tone for the day.

Something more abstract, perhaps. For his ensuite bathroom. He does have a wonderfully shaped fertility figure on the counter already. A flowering impressionist vagina would match.

After he's wandered the halls for hours, he retires to the lounge for a breather. After five minutes of peace, the next display of kinks begins. Somehow, listening to the crack of whips and watching people in animal costumes enacting mating scenes is less than relaxing.

He makes it through the very confusing, and sometimes erotic (like watching porn through the rear-view mirror) maze and finds himself in the next section of the gallery, the life drawing class. This, he loves to watch, and he'd enjoying taking up a pencil himself, but before he can sit down the teacher drags him to a corner of the room and... somehow in his desire not to blow his first interaction with an insectoid-type individual, he winds up naked, holding his bespoke suit in front of his crotch.

Given the rushed recruitment process, he didn't have time to complete a round of clean eating and P90x for the occasion. Thus, aside from the general fear of being entirely naked in front of a group of people, he's also self conscious of his lower belly. Gravity is less kind in your forties, and Cam resolve regarding wine and cake is less than iron.

"It's rather... cold in here.

Days later (he's been taking his time looking around), Cam's been absolutely fascinated by the volunteering process. He may have been seen taking notes during orientation, and excitedly completing his quiz, eager to freely explore.

Besides, he's always been something of a nerd.

bangr

Cameron Waltz | 43

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Spring is a very erotic season, as it feels like the entire world is in bloom. There's something coy about the way flowers slowly open, and snow melts to reveal green grass. That said, I do enjoy hot cocoa and warm blankets on a cold night.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

un:electricplay

[indigobird]

✓
That is way more thought than I've ever given to the season. I just like it being not absolutely freezing all the damn time

...though there is something to be said about keeping warm with blankets and body heat. along with other means.

Steve Rogers | Iron Man (Marvel 70105)

[physioneural]

CLOSER TO GOD

[ Steve isn't too keen on tacking on animal features, nor would he even know what animal to choose for himself. But that was a poor choice of words to utter because R.Y.O.U "pipes" up in the guise of being helpful.

"You're missing the most obvious answer here. Let me handle this for you."

And suddenly he's stuck with a pair of fox ears and a big bushy tail, both the color of his drab gray-brown. At forty-four he shouldn't be so gray, but them's the breaks when you lead a rough life. ]

A silver fox. Funny.

[ .... Okay, yeah, it's pretty funny. Touche, R.Y.O.U. ]

STARRY SKY

[ The jungle is a disconcerting familiarity once he's surrounded by it again, heading for a clearing R.O.S.I.E has kindly(??) pointed out for those curious. The only silver lining is that it's not unbearably humid like the pacific. Out here Steve can breathe, and there's time now to enjoy the beauty of nature without threat.

Plenty of other volunteers have beat him to the rendezvous, but there's room enough to gaze up at the bright dotted sky that looks nothing like the one back home. ]

Pretty strange looking at a night sky with no known constellations.

[ Just as strange is the dim red glow coming from Steve's chest muffled by his undershirt. ]

BANGR

bangr

STEVEN ROGERS| 44

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
I suppose any season that's not covered in pollen.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Bangr UN - Stark

[gettheshowstarted]

✓

You got some allergies?

Alec McDowell | Dark Angel | OTA

[fourninefour]

I. Awakening

[When Alec first opens his eyes, his initial assumption is that he’s back at Manticore. The lights, the machines, and the sterile environment of the ship all remind him of the facilities in which he’d lived until Max broke them all out.

He’s groggy, rubbing his eyes as he sits up. The rest of his body falls into line a moment later as he glances around him, using his enhanced sight and hearing to better understand and observe his current surroundings.

Alec is pretty sure he absolutely doesn’t trust this. He promised to help, naturally, but he still doesn’t trust this. Some corporation conveniently happens to be looking for volunteers for a cure for an illness spanning across multiple universes?]

Museum, huh?

[He muses out loud, a smirk tugging at the side of his face. Well then. Maybe this little adventure could turn some kind of profit for him after all.]


II. Orientation

[Alec feels justified in his earlier suspicions of Zenith as he sits through orientation. He feels distinctly uneasy as parallels to Manticore and Ames White’s creepy breeding cult cut through his thoughts like sparks of lightning. He fidgets in his seat, and, subconsciously, brings one of his hands up to scratch against the barcode embedded into the skin of his neck.]

So this is cheerful and not at all ominous.

[His commentary isn’t wanted, most likely, but since when has that ever stopped Alec before? He does so appreciate a challenge.]

Maybe they should ease up on the emphasizing on how beneficial they are. Kind of makes them seem even more obviously like the opposite.

[And Alec, in his messed up, crazy life, would absolutely know.]


III. Museum

[R.Y.U.O. says that, and Alec snorts. Yeah, good luck with that. He doesn’t know what he was expecting when the museum was first mentioned, but he does know it wasn’t this: not-so-subtle references to acts of sex, body parts, and more sex.

He must admit, the creativity of some of the poses is quite impressive, and he stops in front of one particularly tangled sculpture to admire the curves of each entwined body.]

Bendy, and likely to wind up with someone ending up on the floor. But doable.


IV. Bangr

bangr

Alec McDowell | 20ish

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Honestly? Seasons in Seattle are all the same after the Pulse. So any, really. But I am fond of extra sweat if you know what I mean.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

BANGR - UN: wastelander

[wasteland_101]

What's the pulse?

The Lone Wanderer (F) || Fallout 3

[wasteland_101]

Modeling

The Wanderer blinked as she was pushed towards the changing room. "Are you sure you really want me modeling?"

At least she had been able to have a shower and clean up before she went wandering around the ship. The last thing she needed to do was model while covered in dirt, grime, and blood of all sorts. No one needed to see that. She was also thankful that the people here had been able to wash most of the...stuff off of her vault suit as well.

Even though the vault suit showed that she had a rather toned figure, it hid all of the different scars that she had across her body from her time spent in the wasteland. Thankfully most of her wounds didn't leave scars, but she had a few. She sighed and slipped into the dressing room and started to work on taking off her vault suit. Soon enough she was out of it and walked into the classroom.

She didn't protest as the instructor told her where to stand and she dropped the towel. She had some small burn scars scattered across her arms and legs as well as some very large jagged claw marks on her back from something big. There were also a variety of smaller blade scars in various places.

It became rather obvious that she had seen a lot of stuff in her time before waking up here.

Camping - Frogs!

"You little asshole! THAT'S MINE!!!" Someone was rather pissed off. Food was hard to come by in the wasteland, especially stuff that wasn't irradiated. The Wanderer was very protective of her food and didn't care if a critter was toxic or not. She wanted to stomp the thing into the ground and make a paste out of it.

"And I don't have a pistol or even a power fist," she muttered as she heard the voice of R.O.S.I.E. in her head a moment later. She didn't have any stim packs either so she couldn't take care of anything that might happen to her if they were indeed toxic.

She scrambled to pick up what bits of food that she had left and stuff them in the various pockets and pouches that she had on her vault suit and attached to her belt. "I swear if you come near me I'm going to stomp you into the ground."


BANGR

bangr

Lone Wanderer | 19

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Seasons? I haven't been out of the Vault for long enough to experience them.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

camping

[scatmaam]

"Isa!" a stern voice called from not far off, the hopping menaces surrounding the woman soon turning into frogsicles, frozen solid. A singular, glowing bold line appeared on each of them, briefly, before fading. The ice was cold enough the Wanderer could likely feel it even from where she was.

"At ease, lass. There's no need to get into fights with amphibians here," the source of the voice calmly hums, waving to show where she was, sitting not too far off under the shadow of a nearby cropping of stone.

runaan ( the dragon prince )

[overcoming]

( artistic endeavors )

[ though he's no happier about being here than he was the moment he agreed to come, he is impressed with the medical care. his broken horn is as good as new, his bruises and other injuries healed, and even though he still can't remove the band around his arm, it's been loosed enough to keep the blood flowing. it also helps that there are so many non-humans around, even if he doesn't recognize many of the races.

to kill time, he makes his way to the museum, and realizes only once he's there that he's made a mistake. just what sort of place is this really, that such private acts are displayed so openly..? yes, he's aware of the requirements placed on him, but even so--

a colorful condom sculpture catches his eye, and he frowns, reaching to flick one of them with a dubious finger, frowning. ] .. What are these meant to be?

( nevrione )

[ on his world, the mistletoe tradition doesn't exist, so it was probably inevitable that he'd get caught under it. at first, he's alarmed when his forward momentum is abruptly arrested as he passes a tree, and it takes his years of training to keep himself from falling. is it a spell of some sort? it doesn't feel like any magic he knows.

he struggles to lift his feet again, but there's nowhere to go. he even tries to pull himself up into the limbs of the tree, but-- nothing. so eventually, he subsides, determined to wait until someone else arrives to assist.

he certainly makes for a pretty picture, with his long pale hair and lilac-tinted skin, but the scowl on his face is probably a little off-putting. still, he's swift to react when someone nears, bright eyes narrowing as he points down. ] Do you know how to fix this? [ if that person is human, the question is downright reluctant. ]

( research facility )

[ you're not the only person out observing the stars. runaan is already out there seated quietly on a small hill, and under the light of the moon, his skin and hair seem to glow softly, lit from within. for maybe the first time since his arrival here, he looks.. peaceful, maybe even pleased, eyes shut and face tipped up toward the sky.

he's no less aware, though; his hands are already tightened into fists in his lap, ready to spring up if necessary. ]

A sleepless night for many, [ he greets reluctantly. ]

( bangr )

bangr

Runaan | 38

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Let's say summer so there's some hope of defrosting this ice-queen elf.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Nevrione!

[inthemiddle]

[Despite being human, it may be a relief to Runaan that Silas doesn't appear to be. The young man's hair is a shocking pink and there are flowers growing out from the mop of curls. Two large lily flowers, with honeysuckle growing out from the sides, and a pair of dog's roses poking out from the center. The druid doesn't exactly look classically human, as he approaches to be in front of Runaan.

He is concerned, to see the other man looking standing rather awkwardly in place. Something certainly looked wrong about the staging, however pretty it was]

Fix what, good sir?

Ronan Lynch | The Raven Cycle

[perfectlycivil]

I. Art Museum: Kink
He just wanted to sit. Ronan didn't know if it was the cross-universe travel (how was this even real?) or if it was the stasis or what, but after a few minutes of wandering through the art museum, he needed to get away.

That was how he found the red, plush couches. Red like a warning, but he dropped down onto one anyway with a quiet, restless sigh. For a moment, he felt like he could fall asleep. That made him startle awake, blue eyes flashing wide open. That was when he noticed the suspension gear hanging from the ceiling.

"Holy shit," he breathed. "What the fuck?"


II. Heawood
It looked like some warzone, or the site of a recent natural disaster. Some people looked at Ronan like he had something to do with it. The weird rush of going through the orientation distracted him from a lot of things, but now that he was out in the crisp, winter air, he was suddenly aware of how alone he was here. He didn't even have Chainsaw, and he found himself hoping she was okay, wherever she might be. He rubbed his hand over his short hair, then pulled up his hood. He didn't have a coat, but the cold wasn't any worse than a winter day at the Barns. He could handle it.

"What the fuck are you looking at?" he snapped.

Great first impression, whispered a voice that sounded achingly like Gansey's. Shit.


III. Wildcard
hit me

IV. BANGR

bangr

Ronan Lynch | 18

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Fuck off

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

bangr;

[shadowblends]

✓

never heard of that season before.

Ray Palmer | DCTV | ota

[scienceoutofanything]

artistic endeavours;
1. multple exhibits -

[Ray isn't sure what he expected, but... condom floral arrangements were not quite on the list, or all the diagrams of alien sex. It might be fascinating? But it's a little... much. Too much, maybe. He idly tugs at his collar, averting his eyes from some painting that looked like to be a lovingly painted and detailed view of a woman's... private are as some sort of intricate flower.]

... Wow. Somebody put in their study time.

[Don't get him wrong. He's impressed. But eventually, he slips away to take a bit of a breather in what looks like a lounge area. Or he thought it was until right about the time a man in a gimp mask catches his attention. You can bet Ray excuses himself pretty fast out of that section--

Or, well, moderately fast. He finds some twisted sort of fascination in some of the kinks he's never heard of. But he's kind of done by the time he reaches the mirror maze that seems to be encouraging masturbation.]

Um-- excuse me? [He turns to the nearest person.]

Do you know the way out?

2. art class

[Finally, after he escapes the weird, kinky maze, he's apparently walked right into some sort of art class where a man with an impressive mustache and a set of eyes insists he's-- a model?]

Oh, uh-- [He manages a nervous laugh as he's ushered along.] I don't think I'd really be good at this. I mean I can be really bad at sitting still and I don't really want to take my clothes off.

[Not that this guy seems to be listening or anything. When he's left to get undressed, Ray pushes a hand through his hair and huffs out a sigh. He gives a look to whoever seems to be roped into the same situation, arching a brow.]

Let me guess... you're just the model they want too, huh?

nevrione;

[After orientation, they arrive at Heawood eventually, and Ray shudders as he steps out to chill air, pulling his clothes tighter around him as he wanders through the town. He tries to greet some locals, but the response he receives is chilly at best and eventually, even he's got to get the picture that they don't want to be bothered.

It's kind of disappointing but eventually, he just settles for wandering around on his own. He doesn't need directions, right? Right. And while it feels a little late for mistletoe, eventually Ray goes to inspect some that seems hung all around.]

I didn't think I'd be seeing any of this hung around...

[He starts, lips curling up into an amused smile... for as long as it takes him to realize that the plant seems to be having some sort of effect on him. Brows furrow thoughtfully. He wants to move-- or maybe he doesn't. He can't quite make himself, but it doesn't feel like any invisible force or anything.]

Hey, do you know anything about these plants?

research facility;

1. tents -

[He isn't sure what he expected, but tents... weren't exactly it. He knows it's temporary and Ray isn't really that bothered by camping, but something about being inside one makes him feel... off. Not entirely in a bad way, unless you count the fact he doesn't really know anyone around here. He feels overly warm and a little oversensitive. It's... weird.

Eventually, he'll try to make his way outside and watch the movie, ignoring whatever effects those aphrodisiacs seem to be having on him. He won't say no to company, or anyone who wants to slip out and check out any other place. Why not? He's not feeling particularly tired at the moment.]

2.stargazing -

[Okay, after crazy, multiplying frogs and aphrodisiac-laced tents, Ray gives up on sleep and decides to follow R.O.S.I.E. out to do a bit of stargazing. He's too wound up to sleep anyway, too much on his head. He won't say no to anyone who wants to keep him company, or who might stumble across the viewing spot he was led to.

He's not worried about the demons, himself, but he'll be keeping a wary eye out... and he won't hesitate to help whoever might need it either.]

bangr;

bangr

RAYMOND PALMER | 37

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Oh, I guess winter? Perfect excuse to cuddle up and share some body heat.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Bangr UN: Stark

[gettheshowstarted]

✓

Pretty much the only thing that makes the cold bearable.

Delilah "Lila" Bard | Shades of Magic

[oneofadamnedkind]

Nevrione 1.

Unlike the other volunteers who head off the ship for the Inn, Lila ducks out and heads for the forest. Not for the devastation or perhaps a glimpse at a god, dead or otherwise, but for the pirate. Since she learned of Hoshiko's existence Lila's been determined to find her or her ship.

If there's a ship, she wants to be on it. If she can take it over in the pirate's absence, even better.

Unfortunately all she accomplishes is...getting lost.

Fuck.

Nevrione 3.

Lila did not come here to save the world(s), and she did not come here to have sex.

She came here for an adventure.

And so far? It hasn't been living up to what she'd been told. Sure, she's seeing things the likes of which she's never experienced, but she's also been locked up in a solitary holding cell for pulling her knife on too many people. (That thing that had tried to make her wear a towel deserved it. It's lucky she didn't gut it for touching her.) They made her watch something called a video, which was incredible. All the moving images, the sound, it was the strangest kind of magic she's ever seen.

But all it talked about was how violence is bad and they need to work together to find a cure.

They said if she threatens to stab one more person they'll take her knife away, the only one she was allowed to bring, but they can't take her magic. So when she gets stuck in place and someone approaches her and tries to kiss her she lights a flame above her palm. It flickers, casting a warm glow over the black goat horns protruding from her head like the kind on her Sarow's mask.

"Try it," she challenges them.

They don't try it.

...Which is why an hour later she's still standing there under the mistletoe looking murderously up at it.

Nevrione Marketplace

They've taken all but one of Lila's knives. She was able to keep her favorite, the one she won off Lenos in a bet. But there's a marketplace here, stalls and booths and shops, and she has a feeling there are no wards guarding them.

She's right.

It's only made slightly more difficult by the way the shop owners glare, their eyes following her with cool gazes. They know she isn't one of them, even with the goat horns (that she can't figure out how to remove!). But Lila's good at distractions, she creates one now, knocking over a display with feigned fluster and apologies, only to pocket a choice dagger when the shop keep comes over to fix her mess, shooing her out the door.

She leaves with the dagger snug in her boot. It's a start.

Bangr

bangr

Lila Bard | 19

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
i sleep with knives

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

[voremaid]

✓

Um, you know why you're here, right?

Steve Trevor | DCEU

[candosomething]

i. museum #4

Steve makes his way slowly through the museum, examining some pieces of art and turning abruptly from others. He's no prude, and he knows what he signed on to do in this mission, but talk about tossing a guy into the deep end.

He walks a little faster, sighing in relief when he reaches the end of the paintings, but no sooner has he entered the next room than he's accosted by some sort of bespectacled insect man. It's honestly terrifying, and Steve lets himself be herded towards a little room, not realizing until it's too late just what the towel is for.

Am I doing this? Steve wonders as he begins to take off his shirt. There's the deep end, and then there's....whatever this is, and as Steve discards his trousers he abruptly decides that no, he is not getting naked on his first day here, not even for art. Except when he reaches for his clothes, they're already gone.

"Oh, come on," Steve sighs, "Really?" He pokes his head through the white curtain and signals the first person he sees.

"Psst! Hey!" Steve clutches the curtain to himself. "I need some help."

ii. bangr:

bangr

Steve Trevor| 35

What's my favorite season to have sex?
Any of them where I'm still alive, I guess. Too low a bar?

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Bangr UN: Stark

[gettheshowstarted]

✓

Who says the bar has to be high?

Nick Sax | Happy! | cw: language

[aneverswirlingtoilet]

artistic endeavors;

[Nick knew what he signed up for when he agreed to come here, so he's not gonna pretend to be scandalized that a probably bullshit research project based on sex would be above a museum like this. He looks around with a twisted sort of amusement, chuckling to himself when he sees a particularly far out painting.]

You know, never been much of an art guy... maybe if it looked more like this back home.

[Although he does pause, tilting his head at the sight of a particularly strange set of junk.]

The hell is that? I mean-- is that some kinda messed up cunt or... the hell do you do with it, is what I wanna know.

[As the little adventure though the art museum continues, Nick might need to be scolded for prodding at someone's.... 'creative' condom sculpture or for trying to light up a cigarette too close to the paintings. He doesn't give a shit, but eventually he sneaks off and winds up in some hardcore section of the museum. He lingers there, lingering here and there. He might turn to whoever's next to him with a wry look on his face as he comments:]

Usually, you gotta pay a couple hundred for somebody to do that... Know what I'm saying?

[Oh, yeah, you know what he's saying.]

nevrione;

[At least Nick came weather-prepared. He tugs his coat around him tighter, makes sure his scarf is wrapped around his neck as he sets out through the town of Heawood. He's used to unfriendly welcomes, so it doesn't bother him a lot if folks are a bit rude, as long as they'll tell hm where to buy a pack of smokes or get a drink.

And fuck, does he hope they have that kinda stuff here or he might have signed a direct ticket to hell.

He doesn't pay too much mind to the mistletoe. It was all Merry-fucking-Christmas back home, so it's not like he's not used to seeing it everywhere. It isn't until he notices some weird effects that he starts getting a bad feeling about it and putting two and two together.

He doesn't want to believe it... shit like this doesn't happen in real life, but apparently these Selva fucks or whatever they were called are messing with him. He scowls, looking towards the nearest person.]

Hey, come gimme a kiss, would you? I got stuff to do.

research facility;

[Nick has zero interest in staying in a tent, so you can bet your sweet ass he's not gonna be in one. He'll be out, wandering around when he can, stopping in to watch the movie for a bit before he's wandering off again.

Eventually, he follows R.O.S.I.E.'s directions to some spot to stargaze because why the hell not? He's a little restless, maybe a little bit guilty that he ran away... but hey, they told him it was to save the world, right? who could blame him...

Besides, he was tired. He could use a vacation.

He just hadn't pictured the sleeping-in-a-tent kinda thing.]

bangr

bangr

Nicholas Sax | 50

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Eh, anytime's good. I mean, are you really gonna tell me there's a bad time to get your dick wet?

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

un:waltz

[enveloped]

✓

A tsunami.

For as long as it stayed attached to you.

Larry Laffer | Leisure Suit Larry: Wet Dreams Don't Dry

[loungelizard]

A. ARTISTIC ENDEAVORS 2: Second Verse, Same as the First

[If anything was his environment, this was it. Marvin Gaye playing overhead — classic. Art of such refined and insightful tastes displayed everywhere. While he wasn’t expecting a place like this to be part of a space ship, he’s so far from complaining that it really should be shameful.

It’s far from a perfect scenario, because the oft-squelched voice in the back of his mind is pretty certain that masturbating in public absolutely counts as “inappropriately touching anything,” so that kind of puts a damper on things. Not that it’s easy to keep it up when some of the depictions of alien sex can be (at best) confusing or (at worst) alarming.

To any volunteer compatriot equally curious enough to investigate just as closely, he turns to ask in a conspiratorial whisper:]

Do you think he survives this at the end?

B. NEVRIONE 2: Dam it All
[The change came on abruptly. He was in the middle of getting his bearings around here when they suddenly appeared without any context: the short, stout ears and broad, flat tail of no other than the red-blooded North American…

…beaver.

The wardrobe malfunction that followed means that he has to leave his shirt untucked to make room for the tail to come out from under his jacket, which he’s not terribly keen on, but he delights in the euphemism far too much to be truly that bothered by it.]

I’ve heard before that you are what you eat, but this is taking it a bit far! Hehe.

C. Bangr

bangr

Larry Laffer | 36

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Uhh…I have to pick? Well, summer, I guess. Everyone by the pool or beach is already half-naked. Most of the work is already done!

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Garrett Hawke | Dragon Age | OTA

[defaulthawke]

one: nude modeling

[There is a very large, very buff man who is apparently getting roped into the nude modeling. The man looks confused at first, but after a moment he grins and immediately starts stripping.

It's worth mentioning that he has a pair of scars: one on his mid-back just over the spine (yikes!) and a matching one in the front, between his abs and absurd pecs. Also, he has a massive dick. A fact that he seems very proud of. You'll find him doing a full-on Captain Morgan pose.

He's hot, but god, at what cost?]


two: mistletoe

[Predictably he gets stuck. You have two options.

Option A: he's sitting on a rock (under the overhanging mistletoe branch), staring hard at his phone. Something seems to be causing him enormous stress, or perhaps he's just constipated.

Option B: Garrett loves the animal features thing, and has chosen to try out MAGNIFICENT ELK ANTLERS. He's stuck- literally. Stuck in a tree. Stuck somewhere. Large 6'4 beef man with antlers stuck on a tree branch or something. It's hilarious. Help him.]

reaches 4 dat dick

[shenandoah]

Well, well.

[ cyrus has found himself roped into the modeling gig as well, and he also finds his attention immediately drawn to what is obviously the most confident man in the room. not that he's exactly lacking in confidence himself; his own body isn't much to show off, not exceptionally fit but not particularly out of shape, either, lean and tall and otherwise perfectly average on the whole, but the towel he'd been given to safeguard his modesty is draped about his shoulders instead, and his body language is utterly casual, even relaxed, as he leans against the wall and looks garrett over like he's scouting some new prize. ]

It certainly looks like somebody is keen to show himself off. [ his voice is a deep appalachian rumble, belying his lithe frame. ] Then again...he certainly does have quite a lot to show off.

Eggsy Unwin | Kingsman: The Golden Circle

[galahads_heir]

artistic endeavors i - food

James Bond eat your heart out. Sure the big 007 and himself have saved the world more than once, but there's a special sort of cockiness that comes from the notion you might be saving, you know, all of existence. It's what helping Eggsy keeping his calm because honestly all of this is a bit overwhelming, and he's been in some pretty fuckin' crazy situations in his time (25 whole years, thanks).

But, seemed like saving the known universe or whatever worked up an appetite. And he really hadn't done much but get out of a pod so far.

"Man, I would kill for some Fruit Loops right now..."

artistic endeavors ii - art class

He's fought robotic dogs. He's fought men with robotic limbs and a woman with swords for legs. He has fought some crazy shit. But he has never seen anything like this art teacher and something about it short circuits his brain for a good five minutes. Five minutes in which he let himself be shuffled about and around and posed and -

And his suit is folded and on the other side of the room and he is naked except for a towel tucked over his bits. Hey, at least he wasn't all that body shy - working as a secret agent kept him pretty fit. But he had never modeled before, and why was that so much more daunting than, say, stopping half the world from getting their heads blown off from contaminated weed?

"Right, okay, so... where do you want me, again?"

nevrione - stuck

With all the warnings about leaving soon, he had wanted the chance to go down to the new planet - NEW PLANET - and take a look around. Would it be so different from Earth? What did the people look like? The fauna? The flora? It made his blood sing, reminding him of those old sci-fi movies he and his dad had watched when he was very small. Sure the more recent ones were realistic and imaginative, but he'd always preferred the classics.

His boots crunched as he walked through the snow, considering the trees around him, the snow and the ice they pierced. It was bleak, yeah, but rather beautiful too. It reminded him of the high mountains back home, of looking out on a world that, at least in a small space, was unblemished.

He did see one bit of a color though - the mistletoe. It made him smile, seeing the little plant, and he came closer to inspect, the red berries a siren call like a femme fatale's painted lips over a champagne glass.

"Well look at you go," he murmured to it. "Good on you, mate."

Wishes conveyed, he turned to move on - and found himself stopped. By what he wasn't sure, he just knew he couldn't move, not far. A few steps either way. If there was a wall he wasn't seeing it, breath puffing in front of him, drifting along. His face scrunched, flushed from the cold, and he stomped a boot.

"Oh come on!"

Bangr

bangr

EGGSY UNWIN | 25

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Honestly the winter. Love having an excuse to curl up by a fire, yeah? And all the best treats are out to play with too.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Nevrione - Stuck

[assholic]

[There was a dark-haired woman standing a fair distance away, sipping from a bottle and chuckling at him and his current predicament. Why? Because it was funny and he was currently the fourth person she'd seen lured in by that particular plant.

Of notice besides the bottle she was sipping from filled with an amber fluid and the leather jacket and amused smirk, she also had a pair of black fox ears and a bushy black fox tail with a white tip that waved slowly behind her.]

Sucker...

Sophy Tanner | OC | Gifted & Talented

[saluspopuli]

Museums are Sophy's happy place when she's not working. When she was a student, she somehow managed to squeeze in an Art History minor while double-majoring in biology and sociology, and to this day, when she needs to calm down and not think about her job, she'll go to a museum.

This museum ... is not calming. At all. Sophy thought she'd gotten over her uptight streak a long time ago, but apparently it was just dormant, and she keeps going from one exhibit to the next, getting more and more flustered and awkward as she goes. She actually almost runs from the kink room, and does in fact crash into somebody as she's trying to make a quick and graceful exit (and failing). Then she gets good and lost in the mirror maze before finally emerging in the art class.

Right. Okay. Life modeling. She'd had an offer to do it once in school to earn some extra cash, but chickened out or had a conflict or some bullshit at the last minute; she doesn't remember. She can do this. Fine. And she's actually doing okay until she's standing on the podium and the reality of what she's doing there hits all at once, and she ends up standing very awkwardly with one arm clamped across her breasts and her other hand over her crotch, and wishing desperately that she had something to cover her butt (she's clenching her glutes so tightly she feels like she could crack walnuts with them).

Later, at the research facility, she's genuinely relieved to take in the movie—it's one of her favorites, and god help anyone who ends up talking within her earshot. Then she goes up to look at the stars, and she has to admit, the view is lovely.

But she can't think of a wish. Sophy's never been the kind of person to make wishes. She just goes.

bangr

Sophy Tanner | 40

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Any season that isn't summer. For which reason I'll just invoke the great Cole Porter:
According to the Kinsey report
Every average man you know
Much prefers to play his favorite sport
When the temperature is low
But when the thermometer goes way up
And the weather is sizzling hot
Mister Adam for his madam is not
‘Cause it’s too too too too darn hot

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

un: j.calhoun

[bardish]

[ Can he check somebody more than once? Because he has to give her props for that BANGIN' BANGR PROFILE. ]

✓

I bet Cole Porter has the answer to all of life's questions...

Paige Matthews | Charmed

[halflighting]

1. Beach

[Here she is, newly volunteered, and already she's being treated to a beach vacation. This is a lot nicer than what she was expecting. And since they do so love saying they're here to help, she's going to get a bikini to sunbathe and do a little swimming.

She'll even go watch the movie later. Why not?]

2. Stars

[But of course there would be demons here. Paige goes out where the star-gazers say they can see the demons. She'll keep close to everyone else. If she can find a good opening, she'll get a little closer. She's the power of one right now, but she's a powerful witch. That should be enough to vanquish these demons if it comes to that-- hopefully!]

bangr

bangr

Paige Matthews | 28

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
They all have appeal. Spring is when everything's coming alive. Summer, you have those longer days to spend outside. In autumn and winter, you can cuddle up to get warm.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

Adam Monroe | Heroes

[godcomplexing]

1. Mistletoe

[Honestly, he couldn't care less what the weather is like. At least he's outdoors, breathing the fresh air. He's walking along stretching his legs when he suddenly freezes. He glances around until he spots the plant above him. He tries to move but it appears he's stuck.

This really annoys him]

Isn't this supposed to be voluntary?

2. Bangr

bangr

Adam Monroe | I lost count

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
Does it really matter? You could have a bit of fun with the weather, I suppose.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

3. Wildcard

[Something I didn't put on here but you want to do]

un: waltz

[enveloped]

✓

One would assume a man of your countless years would avoid sex when it rains.

[Cam hates it when young, good looking people act like they're over the hill. Forty is the new fifty! He's hardly middle-aged, never mind a senior citizen.

So shut up, attractive thirty-something appearing man.]

Don't your aged joints ache?

Remy LeBeau | X-Men (616)

[kinetically_charged]

I - Artistic Endeavours
[A museum with an art exhibit? Of course he was going to check it out. And not even with a goal to steal anything, though, Remy won’t lie, he did make a note of all the security when he had entered the museum. But for the most he is just using it as a place to take some time out, to focus on the use of colour, and brush strokes, and not on what the hell was wrong with this entire place.

Willing to go exploring the rather interesting exhibits with him? You may have to put up with some art talk. And also gamble on if he is telling the truth, or is seeing how far he can BS about it and get someone to believe he knows what he is talking about.]

II - Nevrione
[You know, he normally likes mistletoe back home, it was a fun tradition, and sometimes worth a laugh with some of the students a bit too eager to try and use it. Typically the boys. Seriously, teenage boys, they were idiots. Remy knows, he used to be one.

This mistletoe however… he wants to burn it. And don’t think he hasn’t tried that. It hasn’t solved his problem, leaving him stuck in the doorway despite all attempts to get free. Ok, maybe not all, he hasn’t blown up the doorframe. Yet.

A little help?]

III - Wild card

bangr

Remy LeBeau | 36

What's your favorite season to have sex and why?
All and any? Let’s go with summer. Things are already at a simmer with the heat, so lets turn it up to a boil.

✓	✕
YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

I

[backwaterbelle]

[Rogue should be acclimated to being herded against her will to vastly inappropriate situations, but all recent events considered, a display of obscene artwork and nude art models is quite tame. It's the only reason she's still strolling through the exhibit, mostly lost in her own thoughts while occasionally letting her curiosity wander.

At one point, she catches the scent of something familiar, yet distant, something that can only be from her memories because when she glances around her, part hopeful and part utterly unsure of how to even begin acting, she's filled with disappointment. Instead of wallowing on that, she continues her meandering path through the exhibit, eventually planting her feet in front of a rather interesting painting that she's not even seeing.

Her hair's still a windswept mess, more curl than care as it fell around her, tangled a bit in her loose scarf. Otherwise she's in a comfy sweater, leggings, and a pair of thigh high black boots that match her gloves.]